Koans 1

Koans 1

a stone in the path
many stones in the path
all different tones, varied sizes

many different shapes, varied surfaces
stones in the course of a river
river flows, stone stays,

ringing melody ensues

stone forms the river
river forms the stone

shoreline, herons call,
landscape ahead,

rolling plains, rising hills
all formed and deformed

river flows, heron calls, stone, grain
neither the stone, nor the heron,
nor the river, nor the wind

all are one, one is all

~
Today it dawned on me about stones, about the obstructions, the resistance and formations. That I see it there, that I see so many different stones, so many forms of luck and misfortune, all tied in a single thread of a vision of stones and river. A moment later, I saw the world in that grain of sand I held until it vanished and became my hand. And I saw all the differences, all the differentiators melt into one. I saw humanity as a single amoeba carrying a single stone. It all made sense. It was beautiful. The weight lifted. The flow and music because of the stone was there still. But there was something beyond it us all. A foresight to enjoy the music, a foresight to enjoy the resistance. Not just mine, but also of the world's. And the bitterness, anger, judgements, competition, fear- all of it melted away. Or it was there, and it was not there. How do I say it.

All of what I have been reading, meditating, treading up on. All of it made sense. Not that I was looking for it to make sense this way. I did not know that the answer lay in a stone and the image of the flow. Suddenly a fly passes by, and I acutely hear its flapping. I hear a motorbike and I see myself getting carried away. I see memories arising, I see emotions. I see fear. I see grasping. And I can not point to this place and form sound or  a syllable to translate the place from which I am seeing this. I cannot call it beautiful. But it makes sense. Immensely. There is more to it. That much I know.