I want to write of life ... life as it is now . I saw Dangal. I don't feel like writing nor do I feel the same excitement which I felt earlier in the day to write. Yet I am moved. T lives amongst severe anxieties of many fatal outcomes she imagines in her head. She remains in the constant fight mode with either one of the situations or the people in those situations. Then it gets even more confusing, when she meets those characters in real life.
For example, her mother always says, she has always loved her and done the best thing possible. In T's thoughts, she right now can not bring up a memory where she felt anyone go out of their way to help her. Right now, we have a contradiction. This is where she is most of the time, between these junctions. She called her shrink to verify these differences in realities. But the phone was left hanging in the mid air. She is still confused as to various realities unfurling.
There are days when this doesn't happen in T's life. Those are the days when she does her Yoga, practices her music, bakes a cake, tends to garden, sketch, work hard all day! These days those days are rare and far between. Coming to the condition, now we see, T has a condition based on the condition of her days. Her thoughts are significantly altered, her reality doesn't bother her so much and contradictions and conflicts cease to exist. Mother can claim all that she wants to. For that matter anyone can. Peace, we have signed that pact.
So the effort should in having more of Yoga days, more of music days, more of work days! Period. Which is why T is moving out. Now she has clarity!
For example, her mother always says, she has always loved her and done the best thing possible. In T's thoughts, she right now can not bring up a memory where she felt anyone go out of their way to help her. Right now, we have a contradiction. This is where she is most of the time, between these junctions. She called her shrink to verify these differences in realities. But the phone was left hanging in the mid air. She is still confused as to various realities unfurling.
There are days when this doesn't happen in T's life. Those are the days when she does her Yoga, practices her music, bakes a cake, tends to garden, sketch, work hard all day! These days those days are rare and far between. Coming to the condition, now we see, T has a condition based on the condition of her days. Her thoughts are significantly altered, her reality doesn't bother her so much and contradictions and conflicts cease to exist. Mother can claim all that she wants to. For that matter anyone can. Peace, we have signed that pact.
So the effort should in having more of Yoga days, more of music days, more of work days! Period. Which is why T is moving out. Now she has clarity!
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